Sometimes I hate being the mom

Disclaimer:  This post was written very late at night by a tired mommy whose daughter decided to go out.  

Sometimes I hate being the mom.

Oh…sorry…is that not cool to say?  That's right, I'm supposed to say, "Being a mom is the greatest thing that ever happened to me."  Or, "Motherhood has fulfilled the deepest yearnings of my soul."

While those statements may be true, and motherhood is indeed rewarding, I still have moments when I hate being the mom.  I hate being the one who manages the details of everyone's schedules.  I hate being the one who makes sure kids get their homework and/or chores done (i.e. the nag).

I've seen two children through the teen years, and I hate being the one who sacrifices sleep to make sure the cherub arrives home safely among icy roads, thunderstorms, inexperienced drivers and drunk ones.  Only to have said cherub look at me like I'm a freak of nature for ever having a concerned moment.

My children will tell you I worry too much.  It's not their fault.  They don't get it.  They will never understand until they have children of their own.  Even then, it's likely only the girls will get it.  As I told a friend yesterday, the worry sector in women's brains triples in size the minute they give birth.  I used to question God's wisdom in designing us that way, but I've come to realize, it's just another way He draws us to Himself.  We have to learn to trust.  We watch our babies go out the door and release them into His care, knowing (but not comprehending) that He loves them even more than we do.

The tables have turned for my own mother.  The kids now worry about her.  This gives me an idea.  When I'm a senior citizen, I think I will stay out till all hours, not return phone calls or texts, and fail to clean my room.  That's only fair, right?

P.S.  The author was able to go to sleep after much prayer.  She got up the next morning, confirmed that her daughter was safely home, and thanked the Lord for another day of being the mom.