And the answer is...

For those of you who read my blog regularly, you'll remember that I had a trip planned which I came to realize may not have the blessing of God.  (Read the whole post here.)

I surrendered it to God, and up until yesterday afternoon, it appeared He was ok with it.  Then the bottom fell out.  It was one of those situations which would have allowed for me to still take the trip, but I did not have peace about it.  I was not feeling the blessing of God.

That feeling was confirmed after talking with my mother, who was set to accompany me on the trip.  She remarked (without knowing my spiritual struggle) that ever since we planned the trip, she had this feeling we weren't going.

I spent the remainder of the evening pouting, moping, even crying.  This verse kept coming to my mind:  "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."  (1 Thessalonians 5:18)  I kept trying to get there, but I was wallowing in self-pity.

I woke up this morning and decided it was time for a new approach.  I asked God to show me what He wanted me to do today.  Sat down with my Bible and continued my study in the book of Hebrews, and here's what jumped off the page:  "Although he (Jesus) was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered."  (Hebrews 5:8)  This is what I like to call a "brick from heaven", because sometimes God needs to drop a brick on my head to get through to me!  What God wanted me to do was to learn this lesson, and learn it well.  If even the Lord Jesus Christ suffered to learn obedience, I must endure suffering as well.

That would have been enough, but having the Loving Father that I do, He sent me encouragement to live this out.  My October 14 devotional from the book, "Jesus Calling", reads as follows:

     "Be prepared to suffer for Me, in My Name.  All suffering has meaning in My kingdom.  Pain and problems are opportunities to demonstrate your trust in Me.  Bearing your circumstances bravely - even thanking Me for them - is one of the highest forms of praise.  This sacrifice of thanksgiving rings golden-toned bells of Joy throughout heavenly realms.  On earth also, your patient suffering send out ripples of good tidings in ever-widening circles.  When suffering strikes, remember that I am sovereign and that I can bring good out of everything.  Do not try to run from pain or hide from problems.  Instead, accept adversity in My Name, offering it up to Me for My purposes.  Thus, your suffering gains meaning and draws you closer to Me.  Joy emerges from the ashes of adversity through your trust and thankfulness."

Thank you, Lord, for loving me enough to allow me to suffer, even though this situation is the tiniest thing in the scope of eternity.  I trust You to bring something beautiful out of the next three days.